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Be it from a mental or spiritual point of view, the ability to forgive and to let go of resentments and hate is fundamental for a healthy life. Letting go also includes eradicating limiting beliefs or unhelpful habits that get in the way of our spiritual, mental and practical goals. I always associate holding to the negative things to carrying a cactus with a bare hand: a best it’s uncomfortable, a worst is very painful and it never really makes sense.
Unfortunately, many people seem to see forgiveness either as a weakness and as relinquishing the right to seek justice, or something so powerful and difficult that only a form of deity can do it. But forgiving is actually empowering and liberating: it cuts the ties and influence that other people have on us. And only after forgiveness can there be true justice. Without forgiveness, what people tend to look for and exercise is revenge. As for forgiveness being something only “God does”, we find over and over again in the different sacred texts and spiritual practices, that forgiveness is an act an individual or a community does to ensure peace and wellness. Master Jesus even says that in the measurement that you forgive you will be forgiven, something I interpret as in the measurement that you open yourself to compassion and humbleness, you open yourself to receive the same from life.
One way to forgive and release all those negatives thoughts, feelings and beliefs that weight us down is through rituals and healings ceremonies. There is something primeval about ceremonies that appeals to a part of us, and its symbolism seems to speak directly to our soul and unconscious mind. So today I’m offering a healing ceremony inspired in the Earth-base spiritualities.
For this ceremony we are going to need time, commitment, paper, pencil, a shovel, some bird-friendly seeds and comfortable shoes.
The first thing you need to do is decide what you want to release: a resentment, a hatred, a limiting belief, and unhelpful habit or something alike. Write it down in a piece of paper. Now, take some time to find “the gift in the poison” or the lessons found in what you want to release. Believe me, there’s always something beneficial in everything that happens, either because it makes you stronger, it inspires to act the opposite way, it tests your values and so forth. Write these “gifts” in a different piece of paper. Apparently, Nature is not too keen on vacuums, so take some time to decide what will you fill with that space left by the eradicated “something” once is no longer part of your life. If you want to let go of the negative influence a person has on you, then consider filling the void with people who are more akin to you and your way of thinking. Hence in a third piece of paper you may write: I attract like-minded people with whom I have a great relationship.
The second stage of our ceremony takes place out in nature. Try to find a place that brings a sense of wonder and awe and that you can somehow relate to your idea of Spirit. If you choose a place with a somewhat difficult access, this may help turn the whole experience as an
initiatory journey of sorts. Do keep in my mind the final goal and open yourself to inspiration as you travel to this place. Take the shovel, seeds, and pieces of paper with you. And don’t forget those comfy shoes.
Once you have reach your destination, take a few minutes to breathe in and centre. If you like to work with spiritual helpers, be them guides, angels, elements or abstract concepts such as light, peace, love, this is the moment to invite them to the ceremony. Now, connect to your idea of the Divine, and speak out loud to it as honest and as naturally as it comes to you. In your own words, ask for its help to let go; place this something that is of no use to you in its power for Spirit to deal with it as best as it see fits. Give thanks for releasing you from this burden.
Open a small hole in the ground and place in it the paper with the description of what you are letting go. Fill the hole with earth. Imagine the paper dissolving into specks, which are absorbed by the ground. If you can’t imagine this, then say it out loud. Then say whatever words seem appropriate to state that you have forgiven or let go of this. Stand tall and now say all the things you are grateful for in relation to this experience. Say it humbly, true appreciation to what you have received. Breathe in deeply a few times, and now read and visualize what you are using to fill the void with. Again, if you cannot imagine it, say it. Try to bring forth the feelings that this new belief, attitude, skill, thought or whatever would naturally awake in you. Finally, leave the seeds over the now-covered hole and give thanks to Nature for receiving the paper and help you in your ceremony. If you have invited energies, this is the time to thank them and release them too. Now, go home.
Be mindful of how you act and react after this ceremony. If you find yourself repeating some thought patterns (the mind can be very stubborn at times) have at hand something to substitute them with before they fully form. For example, your ex-husband always come late to pick up the kids on the weekends. Every time he gives you an excuse, you usually think something like “yeah, right, and I am the Queen of Sheba.” The moment you notice the “yeah, right…” stop the thought on its tracks and change it for something else. You can be nice and change it to ” I bless the light in this man” or if nothing comes to mind, literally sing to yourself a “la, la, la.” Because you have eradicated the energy of the resentment towards your ex, changing the habits associated with the resentments will be much easier.
Be practical too. If for the last five years the man has been late to pick up the kids, accept that reality and either take the kids to him or don’t expect him at the established time and do something fun with your children, without bringing to the conversation that Dad is late again. Ex-hubby (or anyone for that matter) can only influence your mood as much as you allow him too. And you’ll notice that, after forgiving and letting go, you’ll allow him less and less, almost nil, influence in your state of mind and personal peace.
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